Every time I read these messages I cry more than ever. This Easter was hard to get through and I went to a service on Good Friday and lit candles and said prayers for you, my darling. I know in my heart that you are still with me. So many times you have answered my prayers but it doesn't get any easier. Patrick has taken a baptismal book from Fr. John to try and repair for him but even he(Patrick)admitted it won't be as good as you could do. Going for couselling this afternoon which is always so difficult. Went to the cinema yesterday with Clare and Zach. We all enjoyed it. I missed them whilst they were away but I just had to get on with life. I say 'Goodnight and God bless' to you each night before I go to sleep and I feel your presence at night more than any other time of day. Will be thinking of you on Zach and Chris's birthdays. Each new 'first' without you is upsetting. Love you forever and missing you.